No. 1LondonMonday 2 November 2026Est. 2026

The Secret Banker

What the big banks charge, found from public information as best I could, with the source under every figure. And a Panel.

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Desk Notes

The column. Mystery shops, what the machines said, the Panel's minutes, the fee letter one clause at a time. Opinion, clearly so, with the facts kept in the Tables where they belong. Counsel ringing in my ears, as ever.

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Mystery Shop · 2 Nov 2026 · 4 min

I rang a private bank whose minimum is not on its website and asked what it was

The gentleman said it depended. I said on what. He said on the relationship. I said we did not have one. He said that was rather the point. I have now done this to the five banks in the Transparency index that state no m…

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1,203
What The Machine Said · 1 Nov 2026 · 6 min

I asked five machines what a London IPO costs. Two agreed with each other. Neither agreed with the prospectus.

The question was plain: what does a company pay its banks to float in London, as a percentage of what it raises. The dated studies say 3 to 5 per cent, the American ones say 5 to 7, and the prospectuses say whatever that…

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877
The Panel Minutes · 30 Oct 2026 · 5 min

Minutes of the quarterly review, third quarter

Present: Harrowgate Lennox (eleven), Thornleigh Aubert (one, late, apologetic in four languages), Lockridge Hartwell (dialled in from a car), Dunmore & Rook (independent), Marchbank Private (did not attend; sent a wa…